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More Carlin Stuff

The page for things that don't fall into the other categories

The Original GeorgeCarlin.com Introduction Back around 1999, GeorgeCarlin.com had a "language tolerance level" evaluation that users had to go through before entering the official site. This was up until the spring of 2001. I've reproduced it here, to show people what the site's intro used to look like. So click here to begin, and see what the front page of GeorgeCarlin.com looked like back in the day. Click each link it gives you, if you dare! Images / Documents Laugh.com article from the Wall St. Journal, announcing the launching of the new site in 2000. The Milwaukee arrest for disorderly conduct. This was once printed over an photo of Carlin in Sometimes a Little Brain Damage Can Help, but here it is without the photo. LA Times Headline about the 7 Words, after the FCC ruling. Carlin's discharge paper from the US Air Force. George Carlin's funeral instructions, written in 1990 and publicly displayed on the official website in 2008. A George Carlin as Doctor Who spoof pic that I made.

Website Updates

• March 21, 2019:
• Added a 2005 quote from Real Time with Bill Maher to the "Real Quotes" page, regarding fascism.

• Jun 22, 2018:
• Today marks 10 years since the passing of George Carlin. RIP.
• Added information on the new box set, "Commemorative Collection". This required updating several other pages, since what had been formerly "unreleased" before has now been released!

• June 17, 2018:
• Sourced and added the "Father's Day is Motherfucker's Day" quote to the "Real Quotes" page. Yes, this quote is authentic!

• June 6, 2018:
• Added "Political correctness is fascism pretending to be manners" quotation to the bogus quotes page.

• May 28, 2018:
• Added another bogus quote that I've seen making the rounds, about the vagina.

• Feb 17, 2018:
• Added a new quote to the main page
• Added a copy of Carlin's funeral instructions

• November 15, 2017:
• Cleaned up some of the FAQ, which had some out of date links and the like.

• October 19, 2017:
• Added a new bogus quote to the list, spotted by Jeff. In the words of George Carlin, "Thank you, Jeff!"

• March 11, 2017:
• The site was down (thanks, John B, for bringing this to my attention!), due to some technical problems on my end. But as you can see, the site is back.

• Sept 23, 2016:
• Got around to adding info about the new release, "I Kinda Like It When a Lotta People Die."

• June 29, 2015:
• Added a few quotes to the "real quotes" page. Some excerpts from the classic "There Is No God" routine as well as the "It's Bad For Ya" album have been making the rounds lately.
• Added some info on "Indecent Exposure"
• Fixed a typo for the "Carlin Collection" album.

• Nov 30, 2015:
• Edited the "Bogus quotes, part 1" (introduction) page. I tried to neaten it up, and also expanded it. Yes, I know it's long-winded. But some people STILL don't get it.

• Nov 29, 2015:
• Added the "America, The Beautiful" parody to the 'real quotes' page.
• Added some explanation for the "finding out where the line is" quote on the same page
• Corrected the wording of the Al Sleet quotation on the same page, along with a typo fix on the "hell breaks loose" quote (thank you, Dennis P.!)
• Also, I've been getting emails from a pretentious, small-brained shit-disturber named Garrett. He was going to offer a correction on one of the currently recognized bogus quotations, claiming to have a source for it. But rather than just do that, the fucking moron claimed that I always take one and only one quotation from Carlin as authentic, and that I assume no variations exist. Now anybody who's looked around the site can see just how incredibly illogical and full of shit Garrett is about this. I point out variations in a number of places, especially on the "real" quotes page. I wouldn't be surprised if this dunce has never even bought a single one of Carlin's albums or DVDs himself. So I told thim that I'd look at his evidence, just as soon as he'd admit that he was wrong in his assessment about how this site deals with quotations. The dipshit didn't get it. So I explained it again. Being a clueless motherfucker, he still didn't get it. So the long and short of it is, I've had to put this as one of the questions and answers on the bogus quotes introduction page. Oh, and his video evidence turned out to be nothing more than the original HBO clip which I transcribed in detail on the same page he complained about. What a clueless fucking moron.

• April 11, 2015:
• Expect to see some ad placement and formatting changes throughout the month, as I continue to do some site improvements.

• April 1, 2015:
• Has it been two years already since GeorgeCarlin.net launched? I guess so!
• I gave the bogus quotes page a much-needed overall, since it looked like crap on a mobile device. Hopefully it looks better overall now. This is still admittedly a work in progress, as other pages (e.g., some of the discography pages) still look like crap on a mobile.
• Also corrected a typo (thanks, Terry!).

• Aug 9, 2014:
• Added a few details to the "wet paint" bogus quote, since I ran into somebody who insisted it was from "You Are All Diseased" (hint: it's not!)
• Added a detail to the bogus quotes introduction about quotation sources. I ran into somebody on Facebook who asked whether she should turn to George's daughter Kelly Carlin to confirm or deny alleged Carlin quotations she finds on-line. I told her that no, because 1) the real quotations come from sources that other fans have too (CDs, books, DVDs, interviews) so there's no need to bother people like Kelly with things that most other fans could source for you, and 2) quotations should be authenticated with empirical evidence, not authority. In other words, you don't verify a Carlin quotation by seeing if somebody who knew him personally seemed to remember him saying it; you confirm it by checking to see if it shows up in something he himself wrote or recorded.

• July 21, 2014:
• I wrote an Amazon.com "How To" article on how to go about obtaining George Carlin's catalog. This is for fans who perhaps don't have any of his stuff and want to get the most of it in as few purchases as possible, and also for fans who already have some of his stuff but would like to see what they're missing.

• July 18, 2014:
• Added a quote from The Aristocrats (thanks, paplaukes!)
• A fan emailed me about an eBay auction he had for some props from the movie Dogma. I offered to put the link to it on the front of the site.

• June 18, 2014:
• Added the "Very Best of..." DVD series boxsets to the compilation pages. These were PAL / Region 2 releases of his HBO specials.

• June 15, 2014:
• A semi-fake (badly worded) quotation has been making its rounds on Facebook lately, namely an attempt to quote what Carlin said in the 1970s about religion and shoe lifts. I added this to the list.

• June 13, 2014:
• Added a quotation from "George Carlin: 40 Years of Comedy"
• Added a link to the bogus "government" quotation

• June 1, 2014:
• Fixed some typos and added information about Grammy nominations and winnings for various albums.

• April 10, 2014:
• Added another bogus quotation to the list ("Christians worship a dead Jew on a stick"). Who are these idiots who take the time to make image files with these quotations, but don't bother to check the source?
• Changed the quotation on the front page. Maybe I should just write a script to pick one at random?

• March 12, 2014:
• Added a quotation to the front page, for St. Patrick's Day

• Feb 6, 2014:
• Happy 15th anniversary, "You Are All Diseased"!

• Dec 21, 2013:
• Somebody recently emailed me to say, among other things, "I just wanted to let you in on something with the George Twitter account. It is managed by hi [sic] daughter, who has boxes full of shit he never published, and she adds bits and pieces." I then had to "let him in" on the fact that there are actually a number of different Twitter accounts that claim to be some sort of "George Carlin" account or another, but the reality is that the one I mention in a few places on this page (@GeorgeCarlin) is for the most part bogus. There is an official GC Twitter that Kelly Carlin finally set up, but its name is @TheGeorgeCarlin. Note the "The"! I've now updated the site in a few places to make mention of this. By the way, most of what you'll see on the official Twitter are book quotations. You can verify them.

• Nov 15, 2013:
• A fellow fan showed me a pic making its rounds in Facebook, with a somewhat obscure Carlin quotation about being made from the same stuff that was in the center of a star and being everywhere in the universe. Despite the slight miswording, it's authentic. I cleaned up the wording and added its source over on the "Real Quotes" page
• Speaking of real Carlin quotes, I've made a few more pics of them since last time. I haven't uploaded them here yet because I may be revamping the Real Quotes page.
• Oh yeah, and I got kicked off of The Official George Carlin Fan Page on Facebook. It's worth pointing out that a few weeks back, Kelly Carlin said that she was thinking of stripping the word "Official" from the title, since she's reluctant to further support the site based on how it's become (mostly a lot of mass-shared meme pics, people who still blindly post bogus quotations, etc.). Though that's not why I was removed. I had been getting a series of cunty messages from an admin there named Juliette Denham before being removed. Then when I wrote back to ask if it was her, she blocked me from her account. I suppose I could try to rejoin the group, but why bother? In closing: go fuck yourself, Juliette.

• Oct 12, 2013:
• Reworded a few things on the FAQ.
• Fixed broken image on the "Old GC.com Intro" page.

• Oct 6, 2013:
• I added a bunch of under-the-hood changes that affect Facebook. So now when links to the page are shared on Facebook, there's a better-chosen thumbnail, description, etc. that automatically get used.
• Cleaned up some of the wording on the Bogus List introduction.
• Added a few quotations from It's Bad For Ya over on the "Real Quotes" page. These are two quotations that I see a lot of people sharing on-line, but the quotations are always poorly worded paraphrases. So I provided the real quotations, word for word.

• Sept 28, 2013:
• Added a new entry for the quotation "Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music." Is it a real Carlin quotation? Yes...and no. It's complicated. Click the link for details.

• Sept 8, 2013:
• Uploaded some new pics to the real quotes page
• Added some pics to the bogus quotes page, along with some further clarification on the "obedient workers" quote and other lines.
• Added a George Carlin as Doctor Who spoof pic that I made, to the "Images/Documents" list on the "Other" page.
• Also fixed some typos (just when I thought I caught them all!).

• Sept 3, 2013:
• Added a few more to the bogus quotation to the list, with some editing. Added the "Roll 'Em" quotation to the (real) "quotes" page. Fixed some typos too. I've made some more quotation pics, but haven't gotten around to uploading them here yet.

• August 21, 2013:
• Added another bogus quotation to the list, fixing some typos too.

• August 10, 2013:
• After doing some research on a popular "Carlin" quotation (on why we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse), I've come to the conclusion that it's a fake. I added it to the list. Also fixed a typo or two.

• August 3, 2013:
• I realized that the bogus quotations list is pretty long, making it a little bad to navigate. So I made a table of contents at the top, with links that bring you right down to the quotation in quesiton. So now when you see a bogus link, it might help to give the idiot a link directly to the quoation, rather than give them the URL to the whole page.
• Added a few more pics to the (Real) Quotes page

• July 28,2013:
• Added a link finally to GeorgeCarlinWay.com
• Added a link to a 2001 interview, as well as a quotation from that interview

• July 20,2013:
• New animated GIF for the front page, made by me! I may try to make a better-quality version.
• Cleaned up the FAQ a little.
• Added two pore pics on the "Real Quotes" page
• Altered the text links a bit which show up at the bottom of each page.

• July 12,2013:
• Fixed a typo and bad internal link. Added some more descriptions to "Links" page and "FAQ". Added "saliva" quote to the bogus list. Also added more details to the "Paradox of Our Time" and "taping sandwiches" bogus quotations.

• June 16,2013:
• Happy "Motherfucker's Day"! Fixed a few typos, and also added the direct link to "Class Clown" that was missing from the main discography page. How the hell did that go unnoticed for so long?!?

• June 14,2013:
• Verified and added another "real" quotation. Also fixed a bad link.

• June 12, 2013:
• There's an unofficial "George Carlin" Facebook page that's full of dozens and dozens of bogus quotations, and unfortunately is also one of the most shared Carlin pages there. The good news is that one of the admins recently got in touch with me, and has been utilizing this site to help eliminate the fake quotation pics on that page! Along the way, he's been giving me a few new quotes I hadn't looked into before, and also inadvertently made me aware of one of the BIGGER sources these days for bogus Carlin quotes: a certain Twitter account that incorporates the "George Carlin" name. In any case, the Facebook account admin and I are now busy helping each other out. I'll mention more details in the future.
• Added some updates to the bogus quotes pages, plus the FAQ
• Added more pics to the Real Quotes page
• Oh yeah, and last month my podcast turned 10 years old. Yay!

• June 3, 2013:
• Minor updates to Bogus Quotations list and Links list.

• May 5, 2013:
• Fixed a few typos, and added a link to Carlin's tour rider on thesmokinggun.com.
• Also added another bogus quote to the list, namely a quote from The Drew Carey Show about hating one's job.

• April 21, 2013:
• Verified and added several more authentic quotations to the "real quotes" page. As I mention there, the collection of authentic quotes are not necessarily my personal choices for Carlin's "best" quotes, but they're the real quotes of his that I see on the internet most often. For whatever reason, "Brain Droppings" appears to be his most often quoted work, in terms of quantity.

• April 20, 2013:
• Uploaded some more quotation pics. Also fixed some typos.

• April 17,2013:
• Updated the "real" quotes page. Also added a link to a 1999 interview.
• There's a popular quote attributed to Carlin whose authenticity I'm still trying to verify ("I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately."). As usual, I can't seem to find it in any of his books, albums, or HBO specials. I managed to find a source that claims it's from the A&E Biography series on Carlin from 2000, but as with all real quotations, I don't want to add it unless I can really verify the source. In the meantime, I did manage to find a quote that comes really close.

• April 7,2013:
• Added a number of more quotes, both real and bogus. One of the bogus ones includes a quote that's actually from Ellen DeGeneres. And the page that attributed it to Carlin was a Facebook "fan" page of sorts for Carlin --- go figure!

• April 6, 2013:
• • I got a few requests to change the text color scheme to something other than white-on-black. Some people claim that this is a web design no-no, because it allegeldy causes screen glare, is hard to read if you have an astigmatism, and blah blah blah. Though I got an equal number of people telling me that the color was fine, and even more people telling me that the site looked great without even mentioning the color at all. Plus I have an astigmatism myself and it looked fine to me too. However, I experimented with a few color changes, and decided to lighten the background a tiny bit (from #000000 to #111111). I think it looks a little better. If you still don't like it, well, tough shit.
  • I added another entry to the bogus quotation list (about acting), and cleaned up some of the other wording there.
  • Cleaned up a few typos I noticed, and changed the fonts (I'm sure glad I forced myself to use CSS when I made this page!)
  • And of course, I added this "More Stuff" page to keep track of updates and other things that don't fall into the other categories. At this time it includes the original GeorgeCarlin.com introduction and some image links.

• April 1, 2013:
• • Launched GeorgeCarlin.net

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