21. “George Carlin’s Solution to Save Gasoline”
GEORGE CARLIN DID NOT write this.
“George Carlin’s Solution to Save Gasoline”
a.k.a. “George Carlin’s solution to Gasoline shortages and illegal immigration”
“President Bush wants us to cut the amount of gas we use. The best way to stop Using so much gas is to deport 11 million illegal immigrants! That would be 11 million less people using our gas. The price of gas would come down. Bring our troops home from Iraq to guard the border. When they catch an illegal immigrant crossing the border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo and ship him to Iraq. Tell him if he wants to come to America then he must serve a tour in the military. Give him a soldier’s pay while he’s there and tax him on it. After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he defended this country. He will also be registered to be taxed and be a legal patriot. This option will probably deter illegal immigration and provide a solution for the troops in Iraq and the aliens trying to make a better life for themselves. If they refuse to serve, ship them to Iraq anyway, without the canteen, rifle or ammo. Problem solved.”
This piece doesn’t show up on any of his albums, HBO specials, or books. Also, it was initially circulating around the web for at least a year and a half before it was ever attributed to George Carlin. Plus it doesn’t sound like something he’d really write, for a few reasons. As usual, Snopes.com nails it. See their explanation at the link below.